Just got back from Brussels.
What started as a nice day at work turned out so bad. I had my 1:1 review with my boss.
The promotion which I thought was due this year, well apparently it seems I am not ready for it.
I am good at 4 Es - Empower, Enable, Energize and Engage but lack Envision. And to rub salt on the wound, I get a 4.85% salary increase - surely it must be a joke. But my boss said no - that's the highest she could give in the UK. My boss was very sweet in breaking out the news to me, so its not like she was being terrible or anything like that. She is a nice woman and a great boss.
Now let's be objective and look at this - failure as a mother, a wife (twice over) and now in career as well. 42 years - what the fuck did I achieve? So yeah, maybe I don't have this "Envision"....I don't know whether I am coming or going or just stationary.
I did something new today. I came home, hugged my son and cried.......
(Now before someone says I shouldn't have done it and that it makes me a bad mother, I know it... but I just needed to hug someone and cry, someone who LOVES me)
What started as a nice day at work turned out so bad. I had my 1:1 review with my boss.
The promotion which I thought was due this year, well apparently it seems I am not ready for it.
I am good at 4 Es - Empower, Enable, Energize and Engage but lack Envision. And to rub salt on the wound, I get a 4.85% salary increase - surely it must be a joke. But my boss said no - that's the highest she could give in the UK. My boss was very sweet in breaking out the news to me, so its not like she was being terrible or anything like that. She is a nice woman and a great boss.
Now let's be objective and look at this - failure as a mother, a wife (twice over) and now in career as well. 42 years - what the fuck did I achieve? So yeah, maybe I don't have this "Envision"....I don't know whether I am coming or going or just stationary.
I did something new today. I came home, hugged my son and cried.......
(Now before someone says I shouldn't have done it and that it makes me a bad mother, I know it... but I just needed to hug someone and cry, someone who LOVES me)
2 comments:
Please do not take this to heart. You have a successful career, are driven and work hard. That is all that matters. The next promotion will be here before you know it:) Good luck!
How are you a failure as a mother? You are doing your very best to give your son an education. You have dreams for his future and you are saving to fulfill them. I say you are a kickass mother who walked out of an abusive marriage to save your son from the worst of damage. You have overcome in the past and will overcome your present woes too. All the best, tigeress!
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